5 Years Sober!

Wow… just wow. I can’t believe that I am actually typing this blog post. Today I am officially 5 years sober from alcohol.

All praise to God!

This is so crazy to me that it has already been 5 years, but also that it has ONLY been 5 years. It feels like a lifetime ago that I was trapped in my addiction.

This post is going to be short because my family is headed up to Seattle for a spontaneous weekend adventure and I want to enjoy our road trip together. Dove likes when we sing Beatles songs to her, so I’ll make this fast.

This weekend we will be celebrating this momentous success, along with doing a very special event with our dear friends. Stay tuned for that upcoming post!

But I just wanted to take a moment and talk about how good our God is. I never imagined there would come a point in my life where I was not tempted to drink. I always thought I would struggle with this unwanted desire. I thought I would continually struggle with the FOMO of being left out because of my decision to not drink. In a world so inundated with alcohol, I felt like I would be an outcast. That my friends would no longer find me “fun” and want to do stuff together.

But God has proved my doubts and anxieties completely wrong.

I am so beyond humbled that the Lord rescued me from my pit of self destruction. He completely changed the trajectory of my life. He forgave me for my dirty and dark sins. Fully surrendering my addiction to the Lord felt like the weight of the world was finally (and forever) lifted off my shoulders.

I would love to humbly share with you what God has done in my life since becoming sober.

Where God Has Shown Up These Past 5 Years

These past 5 years sober have been the best years of my entire life. I met my soul mate, coincidentally at Celebrate Recovery of all places (I see what you did there Lord). And we had a whirlwind fairy tale romance.

Jake was even so inspired by my sobriety that although he never personally struggled with alcohol, he came to the decision on his own accord that he did not want alcohol to be a part of his life either. He is now 4 years sober and counting. Whoop whoop!

I eloped to Italy and honeymooned in regions where some of the best wine in the world is produced and experienced zero temptation to relapse.

I was able to have a blast of a bachelorette weekend with my ladies, with no alcohol involved. And Jake and I even had a completely dry wedding back in Texas, and we were neither judged, nor was our wedding was a bore. Everyone still had so much fun!

God brought our family to Oregon so that I could be diagnosed and healed from my thyroid cancer. He provided us with the most amazing church family, recovery community and God anointed forever friendships up here in the Pacific Northwest. We have been given community whom we can be open and vulnerable with. Friends who truly accept us for our pasts, never placing judgement.

God has blessed our family with the most precious daughter. While doctors warned us that we would likely have a very hard time conceiving and having a viable pregnancy, God had other plans. He allowed me to become pregnant and watched out for both my baby and I’s health during my high risk pregnancy.

I now am relishing my new role, becoming a Mom to my lil’ bestie has been absolutely amazing. She is such a treasure and I feel like the most blessed woman each and everyday that I get to see her contagious bright smile.

Since being set free from addiction, I have cleared up space in my heart to continue to dive into deep issues and work towards finding healing from other aspects of my past. I am no longer living in a place of shame for my mistakes, I am instead seeking healing through the Father. Through this hard internal work, I have been given clarity on my life purpose and confidence to fully commit to it.

Thus, I have launched the website of my dreams (AKA The Happy Hot Mess) which you are reading this blog post from. I have written my first (of many) books. Become will be published in a few short weeks! And the Holy Spirit is continually inspiring me on ways to expand and grow His business.

It’s been so beautiful to fully give my life to the Lord and watch what all He has done with it. I can’t even begin to imagine what He will continue to do with my story. It is an honor to be His child and to be a messenger of faith for His Kingdom.

Here’s the funny thing, this is actually the first year that I am making an effort to both acknowledge and celebrate my sobriety. Most years I just forgot about it, since God had so completely removed any and all thoughts of alcohol from my mindset. I find it actually beautiful that I would forget a sobriety date had come and gone. It helps to show me just how much healing God has granted me in this area of my life.

If God can do this much with my life in 5 short years of being sober, I can’t even begin to fathom what he will be able to do with the rest of my life.

Healing From Above

I encourage anyone and everyone who is struggling with addiction or their mental health, to consider surrendering their pain to the Lord. He will be your rock. He will be your strength. Jesus will weather the storm inside your soul for you, so that you no longer have to wander the darkness alone.

If God could set me free, then he can (and WILL) do it for you too.

Not every story of recovery looks the same, and that’s okay. But I promise you, our God is bigger than your past. Bigger than your pain. And mightier than any addiction that may be keeping you down.

Hope comes from above. Restoration will be provided.

Healing is here, and His name is Jesus.